A CLEAR CALLING
Hello family! (Yes, all of you reading this)
I bet you’ve all been wondering to hear about Thailand and my return. Well, so have I. It’s been a humbling process of waiting, patience, uncertainty and opportunity.. And by opportunity, I mean Jesus has opened every possible door for me to purse my dreams as possible!
In the last 2 months, I’ve been offered 3 opportunities that involve everything my heart flutters for: missions, photography and writing.
The first is of course my 6 month return to Thailand. I’ve been accepted and welcomed back to work at the Happy Home teaching, learning and discipling. However the process sort of came to a long period of silence (and by long I mean a few weeks). I sought out a mentor who has been incredible in speaking truth into my life and guiding my way into how to deal with circumstances that will arise in Thailand. As you may know, their respected King just died and the Prince is not very well liked by the people, which is threatening stability of their country. I’m in love with Thailand. I’m in love with the people. I felt purpose, calling and meaning in Thailand and knew I must return to keep honoring where God had called me to. My heart aches so badly to be back in Thailand. There is so much good to be done there and I cannot express how my hear yearns to be back with those kids in Chiang Rai!! It’s a deep love I cannot deny! In the midst of this exciting time, I was offered another opportunity I couldn’t fully grasp until recently.
The second opportunity I received was to go to Papua New Guinea for 2 months working for Samaritan Aviation as their document photographer, partial videographer and writer. I would be supplying all of their visual content for media and newsletters. I also would be fully submerged in the culture of the most unreached nation in the world. Whoa! Samaritan Aviation owns two of the only 4 float planes in PNG and a normal day for me would look like waking up and going on a life-flight all over the country to document the planes and medical work they are doing there. Including their hospital ministry they have. I understand documenting this would be rough and life changing and I am not prepared in any way other than having Jesus on my side. The December issue of Surfer Mag features kids in PNG watching a surfer and a 5 page story on Samaritan Aviation!! Go to the news stands and check them out! Who knows- maybe some of my photos could end up there one day! But this job is also scary.. have you ever typed in google “Papua New Guinea?” Don’t do it.. it will give your thoughts on how small you are and “taking things for granted” a whole new meaning..
The third opportunity is working for what’s been my dream opportunity for a few months now, for Nations Foundation and the family they have going on there! Joel (who is also my college pastor) has given me and open door and I want to be apart of it! They do documentary type work of radical reformers all over the world who are making a difference in the name of Jesus! And.. it’s only a bike ride away from my apartment which means NO MORE MOVING!
Golly, what an amazing struggle to have. Jesus has blessed me with so much opportunity and I’m overwhelmed by his grace and love for me!
Now, in sharing a little bit of my heart with you I want to be completely transparent. And please, input and prayer is ALWAYS welcomed!!
I’m torn and wanting to of course do all 3. I know my heart is for Thailand and I want to go back so badly, and I’m wondering if there’s a reason that I haven’t bought my ticket.. that I’ve had little communication.. and that this PNG opportunity came right in the time of silence. Is going to PNG a distraction from Thailand? Or an incredible opportunity I have to take? And Nations.. Joel is so down for me to send him stories from wherever I’m at in the world! He’s just awesome and supportive and I’m so blessed by him. And I want to learn and supply amazing content for them!
Here’s what it comes down to: PNG is for 2 months of radical living, doing what I love. what on earth do I have to lose?!! nothing!! Here is a fear of mine: that in my time of being so wish washed and pulled back and forth, that I lose supporters for not knowing what I’m doing. But I think that’s the beauty in all of this that is to be seen.. I have no control over any of it! Jesus does! And I have an open posture of here I am send me. And he is.. no matter what route I choose.
If I know one thing for sure, it’s this: There is a clear calling on my life and I know exactly the direction I’m headed! God is sending me. I want nothing but to serve him and said, “Lord, just use my gifts and my passions.. please.” And now I have an abundance of no wrong answers.
So please forgive me as I deliberate and chose my first postgrad steps. I’m stoked for what Jesus is doing and I cannot wait to keep living my life for Him!
When I was in Thailand last year, Rose told me something I will never ever forget.. “You’ll never regret living your life for the Lord.”
HOLY COW was she right!!
Here’s how you can pray for me:
pray for a decision! That I will not be overwhelmed and that God will close a door and clearly open another. Pray for clarity. Pray for me to be used. Pray for me to be rest assured that things will fall in to place. Money. It’s so rough being a missionary. Fundraising is no one’s favorite thing and yes, I have to fundraise for PNG and Thailand. Ugh! Lord take that stress away and provide!
God is good! Amen!